Greater London · England
Funeral and wake catering in Coldharbour, Greater London
We bring fish and chips for the wake to Coldharbour and nearby, frying fresh at your venue.
- Pub wakes
- Family gatherings after a burial or cremation
- A tribute meal
Planning an event in Coldharbour?
How it works
A typical booking goes like this: we arrive, park up and set up, the fryers heat up, and we serve hot from the hatch when you’re ready to eat. Late-December sunset in Coldharbour is about 3:55pm, so an afternoon wake in winter needs lighting near the van. In summer, there’s daylight until about 9:20pm.
- First, tell us about your wake.
- You get an availability check and a clear quote.
- We agree timings, access and the parking spot.
- We cook to order on the day for family and friends.
- We serve from the hatch, then leave the pitch tidy.
Before we arrive
- Confirm the van is allowed on site
- Think about a gazebo by the van in case of rain
- Pick a flat, firm place for the van to park
Ask for a quote
It’s easy to get a price: share your date, address, rough numbers and when you’d like to eat. We’ll send a clear quote that says what’s included.
Planning help
About our funeral and wake catering in Coldharbour
Sometimes fish and chips was the favourite meal of the person being remembered. For remembering a loved one’s favourite food and memorial gatherings, we can cook pie and chips, cod and chips and haddock and chips and more.
In Coldharbour, a hall with parking is often the easiest option, though home can work with a drive. We keep the menu short: fewer choices means fresher food and shorter queues.
- Where
- Coldharbour (SE9, BR7)
- County
- Greater London
- On the menu
- Cod, haddock, chips, sausages, pies
- Sides
- Mushy peas, curry sauce, gravy
- Quote
- Quoted for your event
- Page updated
- 24 October 2026
What comes out of the fryer
Sausage and chips
Sausage and chips is the go-to for anyone who is not a fish fan, especially with curry sauce.
Cod and chips
Cod is the classic: mild, white and flaky, and it is what most people in the south ask for. We batter it and fry it to order, so it is crisp when it reaches you.
Why fried-to-order beats a buffet
A pub or venue may cater a wake themselves. A van works where they don’t, or at home. If you have a budget in mind, tell us, and we’ll suggest a menu and timing to match. Keeping the menu short is typically the best value.
What you get with us
- The classic sides: peas, curry sauce and gravy
- Works on wet days as well as sunny ones
- No kitchen needed
- No surprises in your quote
Read how we price and what a fish and chip van costs.
Coldharbour: halls, homes and travel
Coldharbour is about 4 miles north-west of Orpington, in Greater London. For wakes in Coldharbour, we plan around your venue and timings: a quote, a parking spot and fresh frying on the day. Coldharbour is one of 764 places in Greater London where we bring the van. Our nearest city page is London, about 8 miles away.
If the funeral is at a church such as St Alban, a hall or home nearby keeps the journey to the wake short. A club or hall near Coldharbour gives space for everyone and parking for the van.
Here we cover the SE9 and BR7 postcode area, and we can serve your wake anywhere in it. Streets in the area include Green Lane, Horley Road and Dorset Road, and the van can serve a wake on any of them with a suitable parking spot. Neighbouring places where we serve wakes include Mottingham (1 mile west), Chinbrook (1 mile west), New Eltham (1 mile north-east), Eltham (1 mile north) and Middle Park (1 mile north-west). Further out, we also take the van to London (8 miles north-west), City of Westminster (11 miles north-west), Marylebone (10 miles north-west), Kensington (12 miles north-west), St Pancras (10 miles north-west) and Shoreditch (9 miles north-west).
A little further out are Municipal Borough of Bromley (2.6 miles south-west) and Eltham Community Hospital (1.3 miles north). The countryside around Coldharbour includes The Tarn and Summer Hill.
- Local schools include St Thomas More Catholic Comprehensive School (1.2 miles north)
Who books funeral and wake catering in Coldharbour?
It takes one job off a very long list.
Here are some of the occasions we serve around Coldharbour:
- Remembering a loved one’s favourite food
- Wakes at a pub or venue with outside space
- Remembrance gatherings
- Family gatherings after a burial or cremation
For anyone coming to the funeral by train, the nearest station is Mottingham station, about 0.6 miles north.
What to look for in a quote
- Travel, tolls and road charges
- The minimum number of meals or minimum spend
- How much space the van takes up
- Payment terms and deposit
Cannot we just order from the chip shop?
Ordering in from a local chip shop is an option. Large orders are slow, and the food cools in the bags. A van cooks in front of your guests instead.
For a small group, making your own food can work. For larger numbers, or when you want hot food, a van takes the pressure off, and you get to enjoy the day.
Diets, allergies and planning
Allergies are taken seriously. Here’s how you can help:
- Tell us about any close family with allergies
- Choose a friend to be our contact
- Ask the venue about the van
- Make sure older relatives can sit
We arrive in good time and park discreetly before guests return from the service.
Somewhere quiet to sit helps some guests.
Your questions about fish and chips for the wake in Coldharbour
Is parking a problem for the van in Coldharbour?
It can be, so tell us about driveways, yards, car parks or a council suspension. We’ll plan around it.
Can the van park in Elmstead Wood?
Only with permission from the park’s owner, typically the council. Ask them first.
Can coeliacs eat the battered fish?
Not as standard: batter is usually made with wheat flour. Let us know and we will tell you what we can do before you book.
Can a friend deal with you?
Of course. We are happy to deal with the funeral director or a family friend.
Do you need power or water?
Let us know about power and water at the site in your enquiry, and we will confirm what we need.
How much does fish and chips for the wake cost in Coldharbour?
Every booking is quoted individually, so the price fits what you need. Give us your date, numbers and serving time and we will reply with a price.
Can you cook in the rain?
We cook inside the van, so rain doesn’t stop us. Guests will appreciate cover near the hatch.
What can guests choose from?
Proper fish and chips, plus sausage or pie and chips. The sides are mushy peas, curry sauce and gravy.
Nearby places to Coldharbour
More for events in Coldharbour
What affects the price in Coldharbour
Your quote will be clear. The main things that affect it are:
- The number of meals
- How easy the site is to reach
- Any minimum charge
- Cod, haddock or both
Comparing vans? Look at what each quote includes: hours, menu, travel, minimum charge and VAT. We set ours out clearly.
What we need to know
You do not need every detail fixed to get a quote, but these help:
- How to get in: gates, lanes and ground
- Rough numbers for adults and children
- The date and time of the event
- Dietary needs, with numbers
Send us the date, the address or SE9 postcode and rough numbers, plus when you’d like to eat, and you’ll get a clear price. To get started, fill in our quote form.
Before you choose a spot
No two venues are the same, so we will ask about yours when you contact us. In general, we need:
- Access wide and high enough for the van
- Somewhere close to where people will eat
- Light near the van and the queue for evening service
Coldharbour is in London, within the Ultra Low Emission Zone, and parking can be tight: let us know about off-street space or permits.
If in doubt, send us a picture of the spot and we’ll advise before booking.
From the hatch
- Pie and chips
- Mushy peas
- Gravy
- Haddock and chips
- Cod and chips
- Sausage and chips
- Fried fresh to order in the van at your event
- Cod, haddock and chips, sausages and pies
- The van comes to you: homes, venues, workplaces and fields
- Served at the time you choose, from the hatch