Kent · England
Funeral and Wake Catering in Nettlestead
Looking for fish and chips for the wake in Nettlestead? We bring the van to you and fry fresh while your guests queue at the hatch.
- Family gatherings after a burial or cremation
- Gatherings at a village hall or club
- Remembrance gatherings
Planning an event in Nettlestead?
Funeral and wake catering for your wake in Nettlestead
We work quietly and simply. We arrive at the agreed time, park discreetly and serve when you are ready. Popular choices include gravy, sausage and chips and haddock and chips, and typical bookings are for gatherings after the committal and gatherings at a village hall or club.
In a small place like Nettlestead, a wake might be at home, in a barn or at the village hall. Let us know about access. Every portion is cooked to order on the day, not cooked earlier and kept warm, and handed over as soon as it’s ready.
What affects the price in Nettlestead
There are no hidden charges: the quote reflects:
- Your choice of menu
- The length of service
- Travel, tolls and road charges
- Any minimum charge
Compared with a sit-down meal, a fish and chip van is frequently good value, as there’s no kitchen to hire and nothing to wash up. We will send you a quote.
What to tell us
These details help us quote quickly:
- The address or venue name
- The spot you have in mind for the van
- Anything awkward about the way in
- Roughly how many people, including children
The more you tell us, the more accurate the quote: where the van would park, how to get in, numbers and timings. A picture of the spot helps too. To send your details, fill in our quote form.
How the day works
We do not cook ahead. Fish is battered and fried when people come up to the hatch, so it is as fresh as from any chip shop. In Nettlestead, it’s dark by about 7:00pm in late September and 3:50pm in December, so a lit path to the van is a kindness to older guests.
- Contact us with the basics: when, where and roughly how many.
- A photo of the parking spot helps us check the van will fit.
- A week or so before, we confirm timings and numbers.
- We park, open the hatch and start frying for family and friends.
- Last portion served, we tidy up and head off.
Before we arrive
- Have a level parking spot ready
- Clear the route for the van
- Confirm numbers and dietary needs before the day
Getting a price
Tell us your date, venue or postcode and roughly how many people, plus when you’d like to eat, and we will reply with a quote. To get started, fill in our quote form.
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A fish and chip van or other catering?
A formal meal does not always suit. Fish and chips lets people mingle. The price depends on numbers, the menu and how long we serve, along with distance and access to the site. We quote for each booking individually.
Why book with us
- Fried fresh, not kept warm
- Events in Nettlestead and across Kent
- No surprises in your quote
- We cook inside the van, whatever the weather
DIY versus a fish and chip van
Collecting fish and chips for a crowd yourself is possible, but it’s hard work. Long waits and a drive home mean food arrives lukewarm and soggy. With a van, it’s fried on the spot.
Not sure whether to order in or book a van? Think about numbers, timing and how hot you want the food. We are happy to send a quote so you can compare.
Allergies and dietary needs
With a bit of planning, dietary needs are easier to handle. Here are a few tips:
- Check the hall has an urn
- Allow a little extra
- Funeral directors can help with numbers
- Choose a friend to be our contact
We start when you give the word, not to a rigid schedule.
Have napkins and bins ready.
Nettlestead: your questions answered
What’s the nearest station to Nettlestead?
Wateringbury station, in Nettlestead itself.
How far is Nettlestead from London?
About 28 miles from central London, and well within our area.
Can you come to the house?
Yes. Tell us about parking at the house.
Is there something for children?
Yes, children are easy to cater for. Tell us how many children, and we will include them in the plan.
What’s on the menu?
Proper fish and chips, with sausages and pies for anyone who doesn’t want fish. Mushy peas, curry sauce and gravy go on the side.
Where do you take the van?
London and the South East: Kent, Surrey, East and West Sussex, Hampshire, Berkshire, Bucks, Oxfordshire and the Isle of Wight.
Is there a non-fish option?
We serve sausages and pies as well as fish. Tell us about other diets and we will be honest about what’s possible.
Do we need to provide equipment?
All the cooking happens in the van. Tell us about power, water and bins at the site and we’ll confirm what we need.
Where the van can park in Nettlestead
Before the day, we’ll agree where the van parks. It needs to tick a few simple boxes:
- Permission from the venue or landowner for the van
- A lit spot if service runs after dark
- Flat, firm ground for the van
If you’re unsure, send a picture of the space and the way in, and we’ll say what we think.
From the hatch
- Pie and chips
- Cod and chips
- Mushy peas
- Haddock and chips
- Sausage and chips
- Gravy
Nearby places to Nettlestead
Other occasions in Nettlestead
Planners, venues and businesses
Booking for a company? Tell us what your finance team needs, and we’ll talk you through the process. We’re happy to liaise with facilities on parking and timings.
Venues frequently have their own rules about outside caterers and vehicles: parking spots, arrival times and documents. Send us your venue’s requirements and we will confirm what we can provide.
Wakes in Nettlestead: venues and practical details
Nettlestead is about 5 miles west of Maidstone, in Kent. We cover Nettlestead as standard, so your wake just needs a date, a spot for the van and a serving time. Nettlestead is one of 922 places in Kent we cover. Our bookings stretch from Nettlestead to London (about 28 miles away).
If relatives are coming by rail, Wateringbury station is in Nettlestead itself.
We cover wakes in every part of ME18. From Henrys Close, Glenleigh Road and Orchard Crescent or anywhere nearby, we will bring the van to you. If your venue is just outside Nettlestead, we also cover Wateringbury (1 mile north-east), Red Hill (1 mile north-east), Teston (1 mile north-east), Nettlestead Green (1 mile south) and West Farleigh (2 miles east). We also serve nearby towns such as Maidstone (5 miles east), Sittingbourne (15 miles north-east), Sevenoaks (10 miles west), Royal Tunbridge Wells (10 miles south-west), Gravesend (13 miles north) and Tonbridge (7 miles south-west).
Well-known places in the area include Teapot Island (1.9 miles south) and Leybourne Castle (3.8 miles north).
- Nearby, you will find The Railway pub (under half a mile east)
Perfect for your wake in Nettlestead
It’s one less thing to organise at a difficult time.
Here are some of the occasions we serve around Nettlestead:
- Wakes at church halls and clubs
- Family meals after the service
- Remembering a loved one’s favourite food
- Anniversary memorials
After a service at St Mary's Church, a wake at a hall or home close by means less travelling for everyone.
What your quote should include
- The cancellation terms
- VAT, if it applies
- A clear list of what’s included
- When payment is due
- Fried fresh to order in the van at your event
- Cod, haddock and chips, sausages and pies
- The van comes to you: homes, venues, workplaces and fields
- Served at the time you choose, from the hatch